Tuesday, February 13, 2007

I miss my Dad

Last week saw the first anniversary of my Dad's death, so after flying back in to Sydney last Monday I flew home (my childhood home) to spend the rest of the week with Mum. I worry about her, I'm not sure she's coping very well, but who is to know? Death of a loved one affects people so differently, and when it is your life partner (or, I imagine, your child) it is so much worse. So I just give hugs and hold her hand when she wants to or get into bed with her before I go to bed, like I used to do when I was a child.

Me, I cry a lot more than I used to. Mainly for lost opportunities - you know, Dad would have loved this, Dad will never get to see our house renovations, Dad won't get to see his grandkids grow up, that sort of thing.

I miss my Dad.

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

My heart goes out to you, Rose. I know it has to be hard. {{{hugs}}}

Anonymous said...

Rose Red, we were thinking of you last week and hoping that it wasn't to difficult a time for you. How lucky is your mum to have such a beautiful daughter who cares so much for her. You must find comfort in the bond that you have with your parents and the real and pure love you displayed to each other.

Your dad may not be visually present to experience all the things you want him to but I am sure he is looking down from a higher place and smiling. Your mum will also be taking comfort in how well you are doing and how much you have achieved.

There is nothing like a good cry to make you feel exhausted but most of all to make you feel better, so go for it. Better out then in.

By missing your dad it shows what a great job he did and what a major impact he has had on you and how lucky you are to have had his love.

Big protective cuddles

Linda said...

Your Dad would be proud of how you care for your Mum, I am sure. Thinking of you.x

kgirlknits said...

Your title sums it all up, really, doesn't it? That first anniversary is a tough one. I lost my Dad nearly 9 years ago, but the minute I saw your post, I thought, yep, that's how it feels. From a stranger to a stranger, I hope you're ok...

missfee said...

My thoughts are with you during this difficult time - I lost my dad 2 and a bit years ago - it doesn't get easier but less intense- knitting is a great comfort

Anonymous said...

You're a good daughter Jane. x

Stephanie said...

What a nice picture of your dad!

You're a good one --- checking in on you mum! Dad is surely smiling down on you!